Deeper Feelings
by tinkyrae
Summary: Wrote this back in March, I'm just finally getting it on Fan Fiction. :) A story about fighting for what you want in life. BBandRae of course. OTP
1. Chapter 1

She stared out the window arms folded, seagulls flew over head in circles. It was a gorgeous day the sun shined bright warming her face. There wasn't a cloud in the sky at all. She had gotten up early went to the gym. She always felt better when she had done her exercise. She meditated, took a shower, and drank her morning tea. She should have felt amazing, even happy. Things were good, great actually. Most of the villains were locked up tight, therefore Jump City was in no need of saving. The team was great too, Cy had been talking to Bumble Bee on regular basis. One would consider them to be an item but they weren't calling it that. Robin and Starfire had finally put a label on their budding romance. After Tokyo there was no need to hide it anymore. Beast Boy was spending most of his time on an online game with people he had met in Japan. He had be chatting with a girl that currently she didn't remember the name of. Everyone was healthy and contented. Everyone but her. She had every reason to be happy and yet all she felt was dread. She let out a long sigh as she heard the door slide open. Her stomach turned to knots instantly, without turning around she knew it was him. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to him. He kissed her cheek and whispered,

"Good Morning Beautiful."

"You're here early." she retorted she bit her tongue trying to calm herself. He shrugged still holding her against him.

"Yeah I wanted to see you." he replied quietly. She didn't say anything she hoped he wouldn't notice her uneasiness. Many curse words were going through her head when she finally said,

"I'll make you some tea." She pulled away from his embrace. She took one step before his hand was on her arm spinning her around to face him. He leaded in aiming for her lips, she of course saw it coming and turned her head. He gently kissed her cheek instead. He frowned disappointed but he didn't say anything. She knew he wouldn't say anything anyways. She pulled away again and walked towards the kitchen. He sat down on the sofa as she started heating the water. She again found herself staring off into space. Her thoughts wandered thinking about love. She never had considered her as one to be 'in love' but even this seemed wrong to her. She had never been good at expressing emotion but this was different. _'You not suppose to dread seeing someone.'_ she thought.

She bit her lip as the kettle whistled at her pulling her back to the situation at hand. She poured the water into a cup and grabbed tea bag. She put it in and watched the water swirl around turning from clear to pale brown. She picked up the cup and walked back over to him. Handing him the cup he gave her a short, "Thanks." He took a sip and looked back up at her.

"What do you want to do today?" He asked. She didn't answer as she walked back towards the window again. "Raven!" she jumped at his loud tone. He never shouted.

With her eyes wide she said, "What?" His blue eyes locked on to hers.

"I said, what do you want to do today?" he repeated.

'A _nything but be with you.'_ the thought came and she found herself wishing that she had an excuse to get out of the date. "I don't care." she answered casually. He smiled at her. She gave him a small smile trying to avoid his questions. She turned back gazing at the ocean. _'If a villain wanted to attack right now that would be perfect.'_

Raven met Lucas three months ago. They met while the team was busting Johnny Rancid for stealing from Wally's Jewelry. Lucas was there take pictures for Jump City News. He took to Raven quickly and was asking her all sorts of questions. At first she wasn't sure about him, he had quiet mannerisms but he made it clear that he liked her. He asked her to dinner and after much persuasion from Star and Cyborg, she complied.  
After dinner he took her to a dark poetry read at her favorite book store. She founded out Lucas was a lot like her in the ways of they liked tea, dark poetry, and reading. He an average height and build, bright blues eyes and black hair. Nothing super special about him most people wouldn't give him a second glance unless they were a 'emotional' teenager. The down side of Lucas was he was quiet, which Raven herself wasn't any chatty Kathy but he was almost too quiet. She thought she prefer someone who was quiet like her but as it turned out because he was so quiet their conversations quickly turned into long awkward silences. After the first date that's how it normally went. Silence. When they did talk it was always about tea, books, or photography. It got boring pretty fast for Raven. She brought it up after a month of dating and Lucas said that he liked that he didn't have to always worry about what he was going to say around her. So he was oblivious to the awkwardness or he ignore it.

 _'Why am I still with him?"_ she thought. Lucas was very sweet and he always agreed with her. He was generous, she could say she wanted the moon and he find a way to get it for her. He treated her with respect never forcing anything. _'He thoughtful and kind but he just not...'_ her thoughts stopped ' _He not what?'_ she looked back over and him lounging on the sofa. A single word popped in her head. _'Green.'_ She didn't move afraid that if she moved her face would somehow show what she was thinking.

 _Swish_

The door opening cause her to jump she turned and saw Beast Boy. Her eyes flew to Lucas back to him. Her heart began to pound in her chest like a drum.

"Hey Rae!" Beast Boy stated cheerily oblivious to Lucas. He had just showered his hair was still wet. He wore and interesting outfit considering but since the lack of missions he felt free to wear his white tank top and basket ball shorts. Raven couldn't help but stare at his shoulders perfectly sculpted and defined with muscle. He opened the fridge and grabbed thing of tofu and carrots. Raven eyes shot back to Lucas who was now standing. Beast Boy turn his eyes locked instantly on Lucas. The whole mood in the room changed. Raven shifted her gazed from Lucas to Beast Boy. Holding her breath she just hoped she wouldn't have break up a fist fight.

Lucas spoke first, almost in whisper, " _Garfield_." Raven took in a sharp breath and looked at Beast Boy. He glared at Lucas and a small _tsk_ noise from his mouth.

" _Lucy."_ he growled back. Lucas smiled at his nick name irritating Beast Boy more. He shifted his glare to Raven, who had yet to make a noise. "I didn't know it was bring your _pet_ to work day." Beast Boy hissed at her.

"That's rich coming from you. What is it you do again? Oh right you turn into kittens and bunnies." Lucas shot back at him. Beast Boy narrowed his eyes at him. He took a big breath and then smiled.

"At least I don't have to think of new ways to entertain my girlfriend." He said smugly

Lucas walked over to Raven. " _Girlfriend_? You mean the one you don't have?" he replied He wrapped his arms around Raven and pulled her tight against him. Raven knew that it was time to leave. She didn't have to be an empath to read what Lucas was implying. Beast Boy's eyes were wide and his face was turning a red color.

She pulled away from Lucas and gave Beast Boy a sad look before saying, "We are leaving now," and with that she grabbed Lucas hand and pulled him out of the common room before Beast Boy get another word in.

Lucas and Raven walked around the park in silence. She didn't know what to say or what to think. She wanted to be mad at Beast Boy for being such a jerk but she just felt more mad at Lucas. ' _I shouldn't have let it escalate that far.'_ she pondered. Lucas reached for her hand showing remorse. She took it fighting her urges to just walk away from him.

"Sorry." He whispered. She bit her lip as she looked at him. "I don't know why but he makes my blood boil." She gave him a swift nod. showing she understood. He frowned and looked down at the ground. "I really am sorry."

"I just wish..." she sighed "I wish you guys could just get along."

"Hey! I tried he was the one who made it clear he didn't want anymore friends." He said defensively.

"I know Beast Boy can't be hard to get along with but he's one of my best friends." She spoke. "Besides you get along with Robin and Cy so well."

Lucas gave her a small smile. "Robin and Cy are cool they respect me, but Lima Bean, he doesn't. I don't know what is but he acts like I stole you from him or something."

She let out a defeated sigh. "Lucas please don't start this again."

"No Raven I'm serious I'm not joking Beast Boy has feeling for you." he jumped in. Again biting her lip this was the only topic they ever fought about.

"Lucas I've told you so many times, Beast Boy and I..."

"I never said it was you." He cut her off. His hand raised to her face. His thumb gently brushed her cheek. "I see the way he looks at you." She rolled her eyes. "Just trust me when I say he got some sort of feeling for you. Whether its a crush or something else... I don't know but I can see it. I'm a guy." His thumb moved to her lips. He ran it across her bottom lip, his eyes never leaving hers. "Luckily for me I am the one who gets you." he whispered. He pulled her in and kissed her. She didn't move she let him kiss her.

 _'You should try to enjoy this kiss, see if you can feel anything.'_ she thought suddenly. She began to kiss back for the first time. Wrapping her arms around his neck pulling them closer. Lucas stomach dropped in excitement. He took the opportunity and open the kiss. Raven opened her mouth letting him in. As soon as his tongue slipped into her mouth, she felt her gag reflex coming on. Her eyes flashed open and she pulled away. She wiped away the whatever remained on her mouth. Breathing though her nose she tried to control herself. She moved her hand away from her face and began walking again. Lucas was stunned with what just happened. He followed after and grabbed her arm.

"Are you okay?" He asked. She closed her eyes briefly and lied,

"Yeah, I'm just tired. I didn't get a lot of sleep last night." He just nodded.

"You want to go home?" He asked.

"If you don't mind." she replied He smiled at her and took her hand in his as they started back to the tower. Raven was lost in thought of the kiss she just had. It wasn't like Lucas was a bad kisser. She just didn't feel anything when he kissed her. Then of course when he had slipped her the tongue that when she almost lost it. It was so wrong. She started feeling nauseous thinking about it. She had seen kissing in movies, not to mention the number of times she accidentally walked in on Rob and Star that wasn't suppose to happen. ' _You're not suppose to gag on your partners tongue.'_

They made it back to the tower and the both decided it was better if Lucas didn't come in. He said his goodbyes and told her call her tomorrow. Raven made into the tower and upstairs. She walked down the hall trying to decide if she should get tea first or meditate first. The dread that she had been carrying around all day was finally gone. It always left as soon as Lucas did. Letting her feet guide her she noticed they taking her to her room. _'Meditation it is.'_ she thought. She turned down the hall just a few steps from her room and there he was standing there. She felt her mouth dry instantly as she wondered how long he had been waiting for her.

"Raven..." He started She sighed. "We need to talk."

"Beast Boy, please I'm super tired and I don't want to argue you with you." she stopped and faced him.

He stared into her eyes. "I'm not looking for a fight either, Rae." He said in a stern voice. She raised an eye brow at him not believing him.

"Okay? So you're not about to yell at me or call my boyfriend a cretin or an effeminate?" She questioned. The corner of his mouth curled into a small smile.

"I like when you use big words and try to confuse me."

She sighed again she rubbed her forehead. _'I think I feel a headache coming on. Funny how even though it was a beautiful day it still managed to turn into a rotten one.'_

"Anyways, I just wanted ask you why?" He added.

"Why what? You should really try to finish your sentences." she retorted

"Why are you dating Lucas?" He questioned. Just the sound of his name made her stomach tie up. Sucking in a breath she tried to remind herself that she was not emotionally prepared for a yelling match.

"Because I like him, he makes me happy." She answered.

"Bull shit." He stated not even blinking. She was lying through her teeth and he knew it.

"Fine you can believe whatever you want but Lucas cares about me." She shot back

"Lucas follows you around like a lost puppy. Waiting by your side at any beckon time." he replied.

"He cares about me! I know it hard to believe that someone would care about me but he does." Her fist clench she was standing on her toes trying to match her height to his. Beast Boy rolled his eyes at her.

"Okay he cares about you, but tell me he makes you happy? How?" He demanded. She glared at him her anger ready boil over at any second. She looked at her door then back at him.

"What does it matter?" she asked

"It matters to me. I want know how,boring, forget he's even in the room, Lucas makes you happy."

"I shouldn't have to explain it to you Beast Boy. You should just be happy that I am happy." she retorted back.

"If you were happy Raven then maybe I would be but you're not happy. I can see it. Look I said some pretty mean things to him this morning and interestingly you didn't say anything to protect him or defend him."

"He can defend himself he's an adult."

"No, that's not what I mean. You could have throw me out the window or kicked my ass, but you didn't which tell me that you don't care about him as much as you pretend to." he taunted "So tell me, do you still get butterflies around him?"

A simple question really but with all the anger she was feeling she couldn't hide her expression on her face. For an instant she wore a look of confusion realizing she never not once felt nervous around Lucas. His eyes studied her and taking aware of her silence he spoke up again, "Have you _ever_ felt butterflies for him?" she purse her lips. Like reading her thoughts she began to feel annoyed and humiliated. How dare he call her out like this and make her feel like a fool.

"Not every one gets all jittery and weak in the knees." she spat her words like venom as she spoke Raising his eye brows he shook his head disagreeing with her. He reached out and with two fingers he touch her fist. Looking down she her hand slow began to open to his touch. He pushed his four fingers through the small space between her hand and her fingers leaving he thumb to rest on top ring and pinky finger. She felt a ping of guilt wash over her as he held her hand. Her eyes moved back to his who was staring at her.

"You don't feel you heart start beating so fast you feel like it pound right out of your chest? Or you stomach just took a one way ride down a roller coaster?" He asked his voice lower now. His thumb began to rub circles on her fingers.

She felt her face flush as she look away from him. Her heart was pounding but she was angry. A very logical reason. This whole thing was stupid. She shook her head.

"Beast Boy I thought you were my friend, friends support each other. So who do you think you are telling me how I should feel." She fumed.

"Rae, I am your friend and as your friend I'm tell you, you should be with someone else. You should be with someone who can make you happy." he persists

"Yeah?" she was now shouting at him "AND since your _so smart_ and a _wonderful match maker_ _WHO_ do you think I should be with?"

"Me." He said in a matter of fact tone. With wide eyes she stared at him almost not believing what she was hearing.

"You?" she questioned. Her whole body was shaking now but she couldn't decide if it was really because she was angry or not.

Without saying anything he decided to prove it to her. He grabbed her wrist pulling her right against his chest. Leaning down, his lips slightly parted he gently touched them to hers. He held her there not moving he just kissed her softly drinking her in.

Raven watched as his lips brushed against hers. His lips were soft and warm. Just like a waterfall all the anger she felt melted away from her. She was stiff as bored as he held his lips on hers. Then she felt it. A spark that felt like she was being shocked. Her stomach dropped to her knees and her arms erupted in goosebumps. He pulled away and looked at her. Her eyes flash open looking at his lips. Her mouth was open partly. She stared at his face in wonderment. ' _How did he do that?'_ She had never felt a kiss like that she didn't think it was possible for her to feel that.

She continued to stare at his lips wondering if they were magic. Her body reacted craving for more. One hand wrapped around his neck pulling him down to her lips. They crashed together and she again felt that magic feeling. His hands moved to her hips pulling her right against his as he returned her kiss. She pushed him up against the wall her hands moved across his shoulders feeling his muscles under her finger tips. Her body felt like fire as she realized she pressed up against him. Beast Boy hands were on her neck now holding her there. She opened her mouth slightly and he followed by sticking his tongue in. She stopped moving as he continued to kiss her. She waited for her body to react like it had with Lucas. It never happened. Instead of a gag she moaned against his mouth. Passion filled their bodies as they kissed. His hands moved down her back igniting shocks of pleasure through her. Her hands were up underneath his shirt. Her finger danced across his perfect muscles. He pulled away from her mouth gasping for air.

"Rae..." She didn't let him finish she kissed him again. He kissed her fiercely and pulled away once more. "I don't want to stop." He whispered.

"Then don't..." She replied pulling him back in for more. He smiled against her lips loving every second he was getting with her.

"But..." he mumbled her mouth was still on his. "Lucas?" As soon as he said it there was a loud POP! The light bulb above them exploded. He pulled away and looked at her. Her eyes were wide as she had forgotten all about Lucas.

"Oh God. Lucas." She groaned. What did she just do? Her plan of mediation and tea to forget about her awful date had turned into full make out session with Beast Boy. Beast Boy! ' _oh god I made out with Beast Boy. My teammate... oh..'_ her mind was racing. She looked at his face which he wore proudly. His arms were still across her back and her hands were under his shirt resting against his abs. Her face redden realizing this she removed them and pulled up her hood to hide from him.

"I have to.. mediate." she said quietly. She moved towards her door and walked in leaving Beast Boy in the hall. His body was still buzzing from their moment. He closed his eyes, his hand moved up through his hair. He didn't know what he had expected when he had pulled away to remind her about Lucas but what he got was less than ideal.

Sighing he removed himself from her door way and walked to his room. _'Shit.'_


	2. Chapter 2

Raven stared into his perfect eyes. She felt like she could get lost in their beauty. Her body hummed as he leaned down and kissed her. Her eyes closed as her hands moved up and down his chest. His lips left hers and moved down her chin then down on her neck. She looked around her room to make sure nothing was ready to explode. Keeping her powers in check was so hard, surprisingly she saw nothing was moving. She smiled as she noticed the situation of the room. Shoes had been tossed off in a hurry. Her cape flung on the floor in heap. His shirt had been flung so carelessly that it dangled across her vanity mirror. Pillows had been pushed to the side while her sheets sat in a crumpled mess at the bottom of the bed. She had no clue where her duvet was and frankly she didn't care. She closed her eyes drinking in his scent. Her heart pumped hard in her chest. He continued to kiss her neck every kiss sparked a nerve in her. He moved up and down he kissed and suckled just bellow her ear. She let out a soft chuckle. He pulled away smiling. Looking at her she smiled at him.

"You have freckle right here." he bend down and kiss the same spot she chuckled again. His eyes gleamed with joy. "I found your happy spot." he whispered almost to himself. He kissed her again. Then his lips moved again. She took a deep breath as he moved down her chest. Her hands were tangled his hair. He kissed every inch of her chest. Her eyes rolled back in her head as he worked his magic. Once again his lips started moving down her stomach. Her muscles contracted against his touch. A soft moan escaped her lips as he gently kissed her hip bone. Smiling to himself he loved watching her. He couldn't help it she was so beautiful. He gently pulled her body down so she was completely on her back. She gave him a look, surprised that he was so confident. He just smiled and kissed her again. Her body squirmed under his. Her hands moved down his back tracing his muscles. His hands moved down her body sending chills down her. They stopped at her black underwear. As if to tease her he just held them there. Waiting. She shuttered and moved her hands down to his waist band. Her fingers toyed with the band as she swept her fingers across his bare skin. He pulled his lips away breathing heavily. "Rae." he moaned looking at her. He bit his lip he knew what she wanted and he was more than willing to give it to her. He slowly moved her underwear down her legs past her knees and eventually off. Her gaze never left his. She pulled him down his lips falling on hers. She wanted him and he knew it. She moaned against his mouth as his fingers and gone exploring. He knew what he was doing and like magic he knew what her body liked. Her hands again were at his boxers tugging and fighting trying to remove them. He smiled while kissing her. He pulled away and took a deep breath. Her legs started to shake from anticipation. He removed his boxers and moved back on top of her once again. He kissed her charaka.

"You're so beautiful." He whispered staring into her eyes. She smiled at him. "I love you so much Rae." he said uncertain of what she say or do at that moment. Still smiling at him, she muttered,

"I love you too, Garfield."

Raven bolted awake sitting straight up in bed. She gasped for air. Her heart pounded as she looked around the room. Books had been throw from their shelves and her clothes and been strewed around the floor. Sweat had gather on her brow and down her chest. She sat wide eyed as she relived her dream. She covered her face with her hands. ' _This can not be happening.'_ she pondered. Her whole body erupted in goosebumps as she realized what was happening. Breathing heavily she stared at her walls. Two things were very clear at that moment. One she needed a cold shower, and two she had feelings for someone other than her boyfriend.

After a much needed cold shower Raven walked down the hall to the kitchen. Even though the shower had helped she still couldn't seem to shake the dream. Chills ran down her as she recalled how soft and perfect his lips felt on her hot skin. She stopped outside the door. 'Stop this right now.' she told herself 'Beast Boy is a friend you teammate. You had one little kiss in the hallway and that is that.' She pursed her lips as her heart began to pound again. 'No more thinking about how he makes your skin crawl. Lucas. You have to remember Lucas.' She opened the door and step inside. Cy was making pancakes and bacon humming a little tune to himself.

"Morning Raven." He sang to her. She gave him a small smile finally someone who she didn't have to feel all flustered about.

"Morning." She replied she walked down the steps eyeing Cy breakfast. She wasn't a breakfast person herself but she had to admit it smelled good. "Smells good." she started then stopped as she noticed the fridge was open. As if sensing it Beast Boy closed the door tofu in hand. He looked at her and shot her a toothy grin. Her stomach did a somersault and her cheeks instantly tinted red in embarrassment.

"Please tell me you're not turning into a carnivoric animal killer like Cy?" he pleaded. Biting her cheek she fought to catch a breath. He obviously had just come from the gym his body gleamed with sweat from the waist up. He wore just basket ball shorts.

"Hey!" Shot Cy glaring at Beast Boy

"Carnivoric is not a real word Beast Boy." She finally managed to say. "Where is your shirt?" she muttered picking up and apple. He smiled at her. He walked over to her and plucked the apple out of her hand. He bit into as he wiggled his eye brows at her. ' _Oh Azar.'_ she thought.

"I just came from training." he said with his mouth full. He swallowed and smiled mischievously at her. "I hope my lack of a shirt doesn't bother you." he teased. His eyes swept down her body falling back on her eyes. The redness only continued to creep across her face. She took a deep breath controlling apple in his hand started to glow black from her magic she moved it out his hand into hers. He looked at her confused. She then proceed to throw the apple at his head.

"Hey!" he cried out. His hand was on the top of his head where he just been struck. She smirked at him.

"Serves you right." she commented as she picked up a pear and walked to the stove.

"So what you got going on today Raven?" Cy asked she placed her kettle on the stove and turned to face him.

"I'm meeting Lucas at Sharps Records." she replied her eyes shifted over to Beast Boy. He had turned around his mouth hung agape. Cy chuckled,

"OH? How is Lucas? Things are getting pretty serious with you two huh?" he teased. Beast Boy made a noise that almost sounded like a cough in irritation. Cy eyed him wondering what that was about. Raven looked at the ground as she spoke.

"I could say the same thing about you and Bee?" She replied pouring the water to her tea. A small smile crept on her face as she heard Cy drop his plate. He blushed picking up his plate.

"You're funny Rae." he laughed brushing off the conversation he returned to making his breakfast. Raven pulled out her favorite tea and some honey from the cupboard. She turned around to see Beast Boy just inches from her face.

"You're seeing Lucas?" He asked in a whisper. She rolled her eyes and walked around him. He stepped behind her trying to read her. She could feel his breath on her neck and the hair on the back of neck stood up. "You going to break up with him right?" he questioned in a hushed tone. Raven slow turned around her eyes locked on to his.

"I hadn't planned on it." she stated. His eyes widened in response. He lean in to her pushing her right against the counter. He put his hands on the counter barricading her in.

"You're joking right?" he inquired. She felt uncomfortable being so close to him while she was being berated with questions. She glared at him knowing how this probably was going to end if he didn't back off.

"What are you two whispering about?" Cyborg asked his mouth full of food.

"It's nothing." Beast Boy answered not even turning towards him. He didn't know what to think. Did she honestly think he would just let her go back to the goth boy? Especially after last night? Raven continued to glare at him not saying a word. She was using all her strength not to knock him flat on his back. "Maybe you forgot about last night?" he whispered.

"No. I didn't forget." she said through gritted teeth.

"Then why the hell would you go see Lucas?" He hissed. It was bullshit he thought he had made it pretty clear to her last night about how he felt about her. Her eyes narrowed at him.

"He's my boyfriend. I need to converse with him about somethings which really doesn't concern you." she spat.

"Secrets are no fun guys." Cy said again. Raven smiled at Cy.

"It's okay Cy." she replied looking back at Beast Boy "I was just leaving." She hit his left arm forcing him to move. With her breakfast in hand she turned and started walking out of the kitchen. Beast Boy grabbed her arm instantly sending electricity up her arm.

"Oh no you don't! If you think that you just going to do what you did last night and then just act like nothing happened..." He paused looking at her. "I'm not letting you go. I let you slip away once its not happening again." There was a big crack as all three turned there attention to the sink. Her powers got the best of her as she broke all the dishes in the sink. She was blushing for the fourth time that morning but this time she glared at Beast Boy.

"Don't touch me anymore." she hissed at him. With that she transported out of the room.

"Dammit!" Beast Boy swore as he kicked the trash can over. Cyborg sat wide eye in bewilderment.

"Um? Should I ask what the hell that was about?" He questioned

"I fucked up Cy." Beast Boy sighed picking up the trash can and walking over to the sink.

"Whats going on?" Cy asked Beast Boy just stared at the broken plates in the sink. He blinked a few times. He wasn't one to cry or anything he was just so angry with the whole situation. Angry, confused and hurt. Why had she chosen Lucas over him?

"First off I let Raven start dating someone who wasn't me. Then last night I messed up by telling her Lucas wasn't good enough for her." Beast Boy explained.

Cyborg sighed, "I told you man."

"I know I know. I should have listened but I was stupid. So fucking stupid." He muttered in frustration.

"You may be able..." Cy started

"No. I haven't told you the worst part." he interjected. He began to pick up the broken plates and threw them away.

"I kissed her last night." he recounted last night. Cy sighed and shook his head.

"Oh man." Cy replied.

"Yeah and it wasn't just a little 'I like you Raven here's a peck.' It was a long amazing kiss." he continued. Cy was dumbfounded. He just stared at Beast Boy in shock. "Yeah. So I pretty much just screwed up the best thing that's ever happened to me." Beast Boy said defeated.

"I should knock you on your ass." Cy answered Beast Boy looked at him confused by his words. Cy nodded. "First off Raven is pretty much my sister and guy who messes with her heart is doomed." Beast Boy closed his eyes he knew he deserved that. "...but since you are my best friend, I won't kill you, yet... as long as you fix it." he looked at him and blinked.

"How?" Beast Boy asked

"I don't care. Just fix it. Apologize, explain yourself and your actions, then apologize again. If she accepts your apology and best pray she does, you thank her by respecting her wishes. No more kissing her. No more making fun or berating her boyfriend. I'm serious man we can't have the team split up because of this." Beast Boy knew he was right. He felt like he heart was slowly being torn in two. Running his hands through his hair he sighed. "If you love her you let her go." He nodded understanding what it meant, but it didn't mean what he had to do wouldn't kill him inside. He was glad he hadn't eaten anything because he was sure if he had it would be threatening to make a reappearance.

"I'm gonna go shower." He muttered walking towards the door. He felt like the his world was slowly falling apart and all he could do was watch. 'God why is it every single time I have to go and screw up?' He thought

"Make it right B." Cyborg shouted at him as he left the room.


	3. Chapter 3

Raven drained her tea as she sat feet dangling of the edge of the roof. She was able to calm down a little bit and was starting to feel a little bit guilty for the way she had snapped at Beast Boy. He did have a right to be pissed at her. She sighed and picked up her cup. Swinging her feet in the breeze she wondered if she should go clean up her dish disaster. _'We really need plastic dishes.'_ She looked out at the city her mind lost it took a minute before she realized she wasn't alone.

"Robin." she murmured she didn't have to turn around to look to know it was him. He had a strong presence about him that no matter what she was doing she could always feel when he walking in the room.

"Raven." he commented at her. He sat down next to her and looked at the city. "Beautiful day huh?"

"I suppose." she said quietly "Sorry about the dishes I was just about to come in and clean up." His eye brows narrowed in confusion at her.

"I honestly have no idea what your talking about." he said smirking at her. _'Cy must of cleaned up. I'll have to thank him later.'_ She thought. He took a deep breath and smiled.

"What are you doing up here?" she asked

"Just came to get some fresh air. I love just come up here and think. I learned from the best." he replied nudging her. He noticed her somber face he moved in closer to her. "Did you come up here to meditate?"

"Sort of I had to get far away from Beast Boy." she explained. He nodded and wrapped one arm around her, giving her a side hug. She return his hug by laying her head on his shoulder.

"Did you guys get into another one of your fights?" Robin inquired. sighing softly she answered,

"Yes but it is complicated and I just don't know what to do. I'm just so frustrated with him..." she paused looking at her hands. "I'm frustrated with myself." she whispered Robin was great listener but she wasn't quite ready to go into great detail. Her dream had cause major issues this morning. She was kicking herself for being so attached to it.

"You should tell him." He commented. She lifted her head and looked at him. She could have sworn heart stopped beating for that brief second. She had been so stubborn the last few months that she had convinced herself whatever feelings she had for Beast Boy weren't real or they would disappear as she dated Lucas.

"Tell him?" she repeated. She already knew the answer.

"I'm just going to tell you that I wish I that I had told Star sooner. I don't know if it would have changed anything but I knew for a long time that I loved her but I never said anything because I was afraid." He explained.

"What about Lucas?" Raven questioned Robin smiled at her like a brother would giving advice to a sister.

"If you were Lucas and the girl you were dating had feelings someone else what would you do?" He asked she stared back at the horizon. Trying to put Lucas feeling as hers.

"I'd be heart broken." She whispered. She instantly thought about Beast Boy, and if he had started dating someone else. The thought crushed her. She knew Robin was just trying to help but so far she was feeling worst as each second past.

"Okay you'd be heart broken but you'd want her to be happy right?" sighing she looked down at her feet. "Lucas is a great guy Raven but he's just not a great guy for you and that's okay." He rubbed her shoulder with his hand.

"Okay so I need to break up with Lucas, but then what?" She suddenly felt like a child who couldn't figure out her own problems.

"Tell Beast Boy that you love him." He urged her on. Her body stiffened at the word love. She knew she had feelings for Beast Boy but _love?_ Impossible for her. Right?

Looking at him again "I'm not good at that. You know I can't express or explain myself."

"I know how you feel, look how long it took me." he joked. His joke was funny but Raven couldn't help but not hide her solemn face. She rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hands.

"Why is this so hard." she asked loudly as if she was saying to the universe not just him. Robin stood up looking down his face became serious.

"Isn't that Lucas?" he pointed Raven followed his gaze and spotted him walking along the trail up to the door. She closed her eyes as wave of nausea rush over her. _'What is he doing here?! We're suppose to meet at the record store?!'_ She thought

Moaning she grabbed her stomach, "I'm gonna be sick." she muttered

Robin had stood and walked over to the door. "Everything will work out Raven, you just got to follow your heart." he replied Offering a small smile he nodded as to say come in. He then walked inside leaving her alone. As the uneasy feeling washed over her she looked down at her dangling feet.

 _'I wonder if it will kill me if I fall from this is height.'_ she thought sarcastically. She really wish she could just disappear at that moment. _"I'm not letting you go. I let you slip away once its not happening again."_ Beast Boy voice sounded off in her head. She immediately stood up and dashed for the door. She hoped Beast Boy wasn't anywhere near the common room when Lucas came in. "Shit." she muttered under her breath as she raced down the stairs. She flew down the hall towards the common room. She paused for a brief second to catch her breath as she reached the door. Her ears picked up a the familiar sound of Lucas voice inside. She couldn't make out what was being said but as soon as she heard Beast Boy voice her stomach hit the floor. She burst through the door nearly tripping on the first step. Expecting to see a boxing ring in the middle of the floor the two competitors fighting for her. Her eyes widen surprised at the scene that laid out if front of her.

Beast Boy stood right next to Lucas he had been looking at something but his head now had turned up to see Raven loud entrance. He was dressed in his normal uniform and was smiling. SMILING. Not punching, or growling, or cursing at all. Her mouth hung open completely confused at what was happening.

"Ah there she is!" Beast Boy laughed

"Raven." Lucas said he wore a an expression saying that he was confused like her. He held his cell phone in his hand towards Beast Boy.

"Lucas was just showing me some of his photos." Beast Boy commented looking back at the phone. Using his thumb he swiped to the right changing the picture. "Oh? where was this taken?" He asked. Lucas looked at Raven raising his eye brows.

Looking at screen he answered, "That's in Paris."

"Wow I had no idea you've been all over the world." responded Beast Boy.

"Yeah my job has benefits at times." Lucas replied. He handed Beast Boy the phone and walked over to Raven. "You look beautiful today." He beamed at her. She was still standing frozen in place. Her eyes narrowed at the two of them.

 _'What the hell is going on?'_ she pondered Lucas grabbed her hand and kissed it. She pulled away her eyes swept over to Beast Boy who was still studying Lucas's phone. Surely he would say something now that she let him kiss her hand.

"You ready to go?" Lucas asked.

"Uh." she finally answered.

"You really should get going Raven. Lucas said he wanted to make it to a matinee movie." Beast Boy interjected he walked over to Lucas and handed him the phone. "Lucas you'll be sure to give Melissa my number?" He asked. Raven tea cup that she still had in her hand exploded into a million pieces. She stared at Beast Boy not believing her ears.

 _'This was fighting for her?'_ She continued to gape at him in shock. She couldn't feel anything coming from him besides tint of sadness and maybe bitterness? What was this he was doing? Trying make her feel worst? Or jealous? She had no idea.

"Are you okay Raven?" Beast Boy asked as he and Lucas bent down picking up shards of glass.

Finally finding her voice she muttered "Melissa?" Lucas smiled at her.

"Gar, asked if I knew any girls that maybe interested in going on double date with us." Lucas explained.

"Yeah and Lucas is going to hook me up with his neighbor, Melissa. He some how knew that I like _blondes_." Beast Boy remarked nudging Lucas. It was fat lie. He didn't like blondes at all. He was trying to respect Raven and he knew that if he was ever going to get over her he needed to find someone else.

Raven felt as hot as a tea kettle. She sucked in air threw her teeth trying to calm down. Blondes?! That was like knife straight into her heart. She was so angry at him she felt like it may bubble over and spill out. She closed her eye fighting all emotion of tears. He obviously took her comment of not touch her any more to heart and now was showing that he wasn't going to try to stop her from seeing Lucas anymore.

Beast Boy saw the hurt in her eyes. He knew that he shouldn't have said what he did. It had honestly just came out. "I'll finish picking this up you guys get going." He stated looking down at the glass. Lucas nodded and turned.

"You coming Raven?" He asked. She just nodded still looking at Beast Boy. "Meet you down stairs?" He said again unsure. He turned at left the room.

"I actually want to talk to you when you get back okay?" Beast Boy stammered he knew she was pissed at him. She purse her lip and turned towards the door.

"I'm sorry I'm not _blonde."_ she spat at him.

"Rave.." he started to apologize but she was already gone. "Fuck." He muttered. How could this possibly get any worst? She never forgive him now.

Raven turned on the shower, she peeled off her disgusting clothes. She decided she probably burn them so she could try to forget everything that happened that day. Steam came from the top showing that it was nice and hot. She stepped in and began to try to wash all the sticky butter from her hair. "Dumb ass." she muttered under breath.

Lucas hadn't said anything since they left the tower. Silence. He didn't even notice how upset she was not that it mattered he couldn't have made her feel better anyways. He bought tickets and walked up to the concessions stand. He bought a large drink and popcorn. She just couldn't take anymore. It wasn't fair to her. She deserve to be happy. She had never felt more alone than she did right then. Turning and eyeing her Lucas shifted his feet.

"The movie is starting soon." He commented.

"I can't do this." She burst out suddenly. Confused he just stood there with dumb look on his face. "I can't. I don't want to see you anymore." She continued. Lucas true form came out just then which Raven wish she had seen a long time ago so she could have avoided him completely.

"You Bitch!" He spat his anger showing. He then poured a nice cold drink on her head. Coke dripped off her face she stood there shocked. It obliviously wasn't good enough that he just pour a full large drink on her head because he then tip the large popcorn over her head as well. She raised her eye brows. Wondering if he was done. It was just then she realized that she had been dating a two year old for three months. All respect she ever had for him left the second he called her a bitch.

After washing her hair for the third time she sighed, wondering how someone could stand working at movie theater. The smell of popcorn never left. What a miserable day. What a miserable week this had turned into. How could two days turn to shit so quickly. She let the hot water run over her body. _'Blonde.'_ The last hour she had spent walking back to the tower she had forgotten about the conversation she had with Beast Boy. She sighed as the pain in her heart returned. She slid down the wall sitting on the shower floor. Bringing her knees up to her chest. She was alone again. Single, and broken. She let out a small gasp and just then all the emotion she was bottling up burst from its dam. She sobbed into her knees. She didn't know it could hurt this bad. She let out another soft sob. Her head snapped up as she heard the door open to the bathroom. She waited listening who ever it was would realize that someone was in the shower and would leave. Not hearing anything she thought it must be Star anyone else would have been to embarrassed to continue to stand there. She stood and opened the door to shower slightly so just her head could be seen.

"Star?" She called her eyes rested on a tall green figure. He wore a sad look on his face. As soon as their eyes met he looked down. "Beast Boy." She stammered she was embarrassed and exposed. "Get the fuck out of here." she snapped her arms covered herself even though nothing could be seen through the glass door.

"Raven. I promise I'm not going to see anything. I just..." He pause biting his lip. "I need to talk to you." She glared at him.

"So you're cornering me in the shower?" She hissed at him.

"If it means you'll hear me out yes." he replied He stared at the floor voiding her death glares. She let out a big sigh. Turning off the shower.

"Hand me my towel." she commanded. He picked up her towel and handed it to her. She closed the door and wrapped the towel around her body. She moved the door and stepped out. He was sitting up on the counter. She decided right then if he tried any more shit she was going to transport herself to her room. She sat down on the toilet and crossed her arms.

He gulped looking at her maybe this wasn't such a great idea after all. He stared at her as her wet hair clung to her cheeks and large drops of water dripped down landing on her collar bone then rolled down her skin. Heat rushed to his face as thinking about how she was just wearing towel. Clearing his throat he pulled on his collar.

"Uh... on second though." he paused looking at his hands. She could feel his discomfort immediately.

"Maybe it would be better if I was wearing clothes?" she answered He look up and smiled.

"I just want this to be a conversation where I can actually speak without my thoughts going to _other_ things..." He whispered. She raised her eye brows at him. "Can I meet you up on roof?" He asked. Raven didn't know if she could handle anymore pain today.

"Beast Boy-" she started

"Please?" He pleaded he eyes locked on to hers and she felt guilt radiating off of him. _'So he just wants to apologize._ ' she thought. She could handle that right? Sighing she stood up.

"I'll be up there in five minutes." She then teleported out of the bathroom.


	4. Chapter 4

Beast Boy hands shook as he walked up the stairs to the roof. He was so nervous about telling Raven that he loved her. With Cy advice in the back of his head, he decided that he just was going to be honest. No more beating around the bush. He was going to make it right. He had to. Taking a deep breath he muttered, "Here goes nothing." He open the door to the roof. He squinted his eyes at the bright sun. He step up onto the hard ground and looked to see her sitting on the side of tower. With his heart pounding he made his way over to her.

-

Raven dressed quickly. She was eager to get this conversation over with. She picked up the nearest thing she could find on her floor. She hadn't had time to pick up the clothes or books that had been thrown this morning. She decided her black work out pants and a pain t shirt would work. After dressing herself, using her powers she picked up all the items that was on her floor. She sighed realizing it was time to go confront Beast Boy. She teleported herself up to her favorite spot. Sitting down she looked around, he hadn't arrived yet. She looked out at the horizon. The sun was just getting ready to set and the light touched softly on the tower. Taking a deep breath she calmed her nerves.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos" she said softly to herself. She instantly felt better. She wondered why she hadn't done it sooner. The door opened and as if taunting her, her heart sped up. He sat down by her his heart beating just as fast. She didn't look up she just kept her eyes forward. She knew if she looked at him her heart may explode inside her chest.

"Hey." He said softly She gave him a slight nod but didn't say anything. This made him feel more nervous. He knew he have to be the one who did all the talking. Gulping he pushed down the lump that was stuck in his throat.

"I just I wanted to say I'm sorry." he apologized to her. She didn't move the only muscle that seemed to be moving was her heart. He sighed not getting anything from her. "I really am sorry Rae, I didn't mean it I just..." He paused. He wanted to choose his words carefully.

"You make me crazy." he finally said. This got her attention she slightly turned her head a questioning look formed on her face. Seeing her finally responding to something he continued, "I'm so crazy about you and it makes me crazy that you're with Lucas and not me." He didn't know that she had broken up with Lucas. She opened her mouth to tell him but shut it as he continued to explain himself.

"I'm sorry that I acted like an immature baby about it. I should have told you sooner but I was really stupid. I'm sorry that I wasn't more welcoming of him and I'm sorry that I told you that he wasn't good enough for you. and if he truly makes you happy then..." he paused shifting his gaze "I'm happy for you." he finished. The tone in his voice suggested that even though he was trying to be sincere it came out sounding quite opposite. She had turned her head was watching him. Robin's voice played in her head over and over.

 _'Tell him.'_

"So I'm sorry about everything." He spoke his voice was quiet he wanted her to know he was truly sorry for everything. "Well actually I'm not sorry about our kiss. I would never be sorry for kissing you." His eyes glanced at her. She looked so beautiful in the sun light. The sun touch her cheek and hair softly. Her violet eye sparkled and he instantly wondered how it was possible for someone to have such amazing eyes. He was so happy that he had asked her to roof. The view was really spectacular.

"Please forgive me. So we can try to go back to being friends again." he pleaded "I miss you Rae." A small smile crept on her face as he said this. Noticing this his chest began to buzz, feeling like he was actually going to be able to fix things. "And I just want you to know that I'm going to be better with Lucas. I don't-"

"I broke up with Lucas." She stated cutting him off. Her eyes stared at him wanting to see a reaction from him. His breath caught in his throat. His mouth hung open. He stared at her his mind raced with thoughts. His mouth and brain seem to be broken and he couldn't form words. What did this mean? Was she finally his?

"You-" he started he licked his lips "You brok-" "Lucas?" he stuttered.

"You should stop trying talk and just kiss me." She replied. He smiled a big toothy grin at her.

 _'God she's beautiful.'_ He thought as he leaned in. Slowly he gently kissed her. His lips were so soft against hers. Instantly they both felt fireworks going off in their heads. Her hand gently brushed his face. Her finger tips sending little sparks of excitement. She pulled away first and Beast Boy couldn't help but feel a little bit sad that their kiss had ended so quickly. He noticed she looked at the ground almost embarrassed at something.

"Is something wrong?" He asked worried he had somehow screwed up once again. Her lips form a straight line but she shook her head. "Something is wrong Rae, tell me." he begged. Biting the side of her cheek she looked into his green emeralds.

"I'm just worried I guess." She answered. Her eyes began to search his hoping for reassurance and comfort.

"What about?" He asked again trying to understand.

"I'm worried that you're making a mistake." He frowned in confusion. He didn't feel like he was making any mistakes right now. Seeing his puzzled face she continued, "I know I'm not one of those funny, bubbly, follow you around fan girls. I know, you know I'm not one of those girls either. So I just think your making a mistake pursuing me." He gave her a small smile.

"You know for being so smart you kinda of act dumb sometimes." He joked. She narrowed her eyes at him not finding him funny at all. "First off if I wanted someone to follow me around I'd buy a dog or no I'd be a dog and follow myself around." He chuckled. "Second I like you for you Raven. I like how little your hands are, I like when your really into one of your books the corner of you lips will turn up showing off a small smile. I like how in the morning you smell like tea and honey and at night you smell like lavender. I just-" He paused looking at her lips wanting her to understand. "I'm pretty much screwed in pursuing because sure I'm already falling for you." he said softly putting his hand on her cheek he leaned in and kissed her again. His kiss silenced all her fears instantly. She just feel like she was floating as he continued to kiss her.

Instead of pulling away she welcomed his kiss her arms wrapping around his neck. This was all he needed leaning into her, he twisted his body so that he was gently pushing her down on to her back. Both their legs still hung off the edge of the tower. Using his arm he propped himself so he could kiss her with ease. It wasn't the most comfortable position for him but he didn't care. Raven was laying completely on her back as her hands ran through his hair. Pressing close to her he deepen the kiss. She moaned into his mouth which made him only want her more. She was positive he could feel her heart through her shirt it was pounding so hard. They continued to kiss tasting each other. Beast Boy's free hand had moved from just resting on her hip, to slowly moving to the edge of her shirt. He slowly pushed his hand up gently his fingers brushed against her velvet skin. He could feel her skin respond to his touch with goosebumps. Smiling as he kissed her his hand made another inch up her shirt.

 _'Oh god.'_ Raven thought her dream instantly come back to her. His hands, his lips all over her skin. Her hand instantly snapped away from his hair and was pulling on his wrist. Pulling away he looked at her realizing that she had stopped his wandering hand.

"Too fast." she breathed her eyes closed for a second trying to keep all her powers in check, before opening again. He had removed his hand and was holding up it defensively.

"Sorry." he said giving a embarrassed chuckle. "Like I said you make me crazy. I sometimes forget what I'm doing." He replied trying to cover himself. She gave him a small smirk knowing fully what he was doing. He smiled again at her, he wonder if he'd ever stop smiling now.

"I just don't want to rush anything." She commented she slowly sat up and noticed that the sun had said it goodnight and the moon was just starting to come up.

"Of course." He said understanding her completely. "I absolutely agree. I would never want to make you uncomfortable."

"Thank you." she replied. They sat in silence watching the moon slowly rise. For the first time in a long time Raven felt happy. She actually felt okay with silence. She smiled to herself it was funny how she felt completely at ease with him.

"I mean what I said before." He whispered. He leaned in to her ear smelling her sweet lavender hair. "You deserve someone who will make you happy and if you let me, I want to be that someone." He purred in her ear. He pulled away looking at her waiting for her answer. Raven blushed at his words. She looked at the moon appreciating it beauty. She sighed and stood up. Offering her hand to him he took it and she helped pull him up which was more of his effort then hers.

Taking his arms she wrapped them around her waist. She liked being close to him. She put both hands on his cheeks replied,

"Please don't ever let me go again." Then she kiss him. It was soft kiss not like that one they had just a few minutes ago. He pulled away and smiled. He was so happy he couldn't have asked for a better night. _'Oh trust me Raven it will never happen again.'_ he thought

"I was actually wondering if you wanted to go on a date? maybe tomorrow?" He asked suddenly. He gave her sheepish smiled feeling silly all of the sudden. She looked down thinking about her last date.

"As long as there is no popcorn involved." She answered. His eyebrows raised wondering what she could possibly mean but before he could say another thing she had turned and was already to the door. "Tomorrow." She repeated then she slipped through the door.

He wore a stupid grin on face as his head began to play in rewind. "Tomorrow Rae." He whispered. Then he made his way to the door humming to himself.


	5. Chapter 5

Sunlight poured into the room lighting the normally dark room. Raven legs shifted across her sheets as she rolled away from the sun. Sighing she hugged her pillow. She hadn't slept that well in years. After her little adventure on the roof with a certain changling, she went into her room to meditate but as soon as her body reached her bed she was so tired she fell into a deep comfortable sleep. Her eyes fluttered open looking at her clock which read 8:42 AM. Shocked she never slept that late. She closed her eyes again she began thinking of how Beast Boy made her heart pound. Smiling she whispered,

"I'm already falling for you." Beast Boy's words the moment they left his lips had not left her head. _'So this is what it feels like'_ she thought. She then remembered she had promised the green one a date today. Right on cue her heart leap into its now normal, quick rhythm. She smirked wondering what he possibly had planned. She hoped it was somewhere not too crowded. She didn't do well in crowds. She stood up trying to think of what to wear. It was suppose to be another beautiful day in Jump City. She opened her closet,

"Black, Black, Black, Navy Blue, Gray-" She listed off narrowing her eyes in disappointment. "Hmm.." Suddenly there was swift knock on the door. She looked at her door then back to her closet. _'Maybe Star has something I could barrow..'_ she thought. She stepped away and walked to her door. She opened it slightly. Peering out she saw no one. Confused she looked up and down the hallway. Thinking someone must be playing a joke her eyes came to rest to the floor. On the floor sitting on a small tray was a cup of steaming tea and a beautiful red apple. A small smirk formed on her face as she looked around again. She bent down and pick up the tray and noticed a note tucked under the tea cup with the words RAVEN~. Closing the door behind her she sat the tray on her vanity. She picked up the cup of tea and slowly sipped it. The tea was her favorite but she could tell its maker was not sure how much honey to add. It was sweeter then her normal cups she usually had. She drank again, the warm liquid spread inside her calming her instantly. She picked up the note noticing the small print in all caps letters.

 _GOOD MORNING SLEEPY HEAD,  
I HOPE YOU SLEPT WELL, I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO OUR DATE. I WAS THINKING LEAVING AROUND NOON? I'VE CONVINCED CY TO LET US DRIVE THE T CAR. WELL WHEN I SAY US I REALLY MEAN YOU, FOR SOME REASON I'M NOT TO BE TRUSTED?! _She let out small chuckle at this. _I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND DRIVING. I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR TEA.  
~GARFIELD_

 _PS. NO EATING LUNCH._

Garfield... He had never really referred to himself as Garfield. She wondered if this was a new thing for him or if he just wanted her to refer to him as his real name. She ate and drank her sweet tea. Her mind on where he was possibly going to take her. She decided needed some sort of outfit. She put on her cloak and walked to Starfire's room. She knocked and waited. The door opened to reveal a tired looking Robin with no shirt on. She should have been embarrassed but this wasn't the first time it had happened. She just smirked at him. He of course was the embarrassed one.

"Is Star in?" She asked He shook his head,

"She's the shower." he muttered. His eyes glued to the floor.

Raven nodded still smirking at him. "Ah, I see.." she trailed off. She wasn't the type of person to make fun of him, although it was funny to to see him so flustered.

"Friend Raven." Star gleamed at her as she walked towards her. She wore a pink robe and had a towel wrapped around her head.

"Star I need to barrow something." Raven expressed to her.

"Of course my friend," She replied "Love, the bathing room is ready for you." she told Robin. He blushed and muttered his thanks and rushed out of Stars room. "Come in." They both walked through her door into her room.

"I was hoping to maybe barrow a shirt or something?" Raven explained. Star smiled and opened her closet. Raven took in a deep breath noted that Star wardrobe consisted of very bright pinks and yellows.

"What is the need of a new outfit?" Star asked Raven bit her lip unsure if she should tell her she had a date their very own Beast Boy. Although she knew Starfire wouldn't be anything but utterly happy and supportive of them, she didn't know if she wanted everyone to know just yet.

"Beast Boy and I are just going into town and I always just wear black." She answered which wasn't entirely a lie. Stars eye gleamed understanding immediately.

"Ohh may I suggest this then?" She asked pulling out a bright magenta midriff shirt.

"Uh..." Raven shook her head totally horrified. Frowning Star put the shirt back in the closet.

"How about this?" Star inquired pulling out a powder pink long sleeve lace shirt. Narrowing her eyes at the shirt Raven bit her cheek. Maybe asking Star for an outfit was a bad idea.

"I know this a lot to ask of you but do you have anything that's not pink? or bright?" She questioned. Star look back at her closet. Her eyes searching each item her brain thinking.

"Hmm.." she began then the light bulb clicked "Yes." She said diving to the bottom of her closet. She pulled out a yellow sack. Standing up she smiled. "This is what you should wear." she handed the bag over to Raven. Raven hand dove into the bag her hand felt a soft silky fabric. She pulled out a baby blue v neck shirt. It was almost too fancy to be a t shirt. Holding it out in front of her she stared at the shirt, the more she looked at it the more she liked it.

"Yes this should work, thank you." she commented taking the shirt into her arms. She gently hugged Star then turned to leave.

"Wait Friend Raven." Star called Raven turn on her heel to see Star holding a small tube of some sort of make up. Star smiled at her. "Use this as well." She handed Raven the tube which read Baby Lips. It was a shimmery sheer lip gloss.

"I don't-" Raven started but stopped catching Star's look. It was just a simple smile that spoke volumes. There was no hiding it anymore, Star knew that something was going on. "Thanks Star." she opened the door and walked out.

"Of course! Make him dead-" Star paused her finger resting on her mouth, trying to think if that was indeed the correct term.

"It's knock'em dead Star." She replied over her shoulder. Star smiled remembering the term now.

"Yes! but please don't actually kill him." she responded her finger in the air. She giggled and walked back into her room. Raven walked back to her room in haste she wanted to be ready in time.

Beast Boy rolled up his purple button-up shirt to his elbows. He walked down to Raven's room his heart hammered excitedly as near her door. He had been so nervous the whole morning. There was nothing be nervous about, it was after all just Raven. Raven, the beautiful amazing, takes his breath away, Raven. He hadn't seen her all morning which made him worried that she had decided not to go on the date with him afterall. He decided to make her some tea and leave her a little note. He hid down the hall and watched her open her door and find his gift. Glad to see her acceptance of the tray he hurried back to his room to get dressed. He had spend the last hour trying on shirts. Only Raven could make him so nervous that he didn't know what to wear. He decided that since it was his first date with the girl of his dreams he go semi casual. He choose a purple button up shirt and a dark jean. Taking a deep breath as Raven's door came into view. He approached her door and stood there staring at her name. There he was about to take a girl who he would never have thought he have a chance with on an actual date. He pressed his left thumb into his right palm trying to calm his nerves. Deep breath in reminding himself for the hundredth time that it was just Raven, he raised his fist and knocked on the door.

-

Raven looked at herself in the mirror. She tilted her head to the left then to the right. Her lips formed a straight line as she looked at the shirt. She turned around looking at the back. _'At least the back side looks good.'_ she thought She picked up the lip gloss Star had gave her and rolled the tube. She push the color onto her lips slowly not wanting to make a mess. _'What am I doing?'_ she pondered, this wasn't her she didn't put make up or dressed up for any occasion. The lip gloss didn't look bad and it had a nice glimmer to it. She looked up and down at herself. Sighing she couldn't decide how she felt about the outfit. Before she could even think of changing her mind a knock came at her door.

She eyed it cautiously. She knew he was there right on time to take her on their date. A date. Beast Boy, the annoying, obnoxious, sweet, thoughtful, Beast Boy was taking her on a date. It was really ironic actually. Out of all the people in the world she would have never thought he be the one she ever go on date with, but surprising herself she was actually nervous and excited. Walking to her door she opened it. There he stood just as handsome as ever wearing his classic toothy grin.

"Raven." he breathed her name. She grabbed the door frame her legs turning to jello. Just one word out of his mouth and she and turned into a puddle of mush. She remained strong hiding the fact that her legs had almost given out on her. "You look amazing." He blushed at her. Her baby blue shirt fit her like a glove and the color actually made her eyes pop. She choose just her classic black skinny jeans that hugged her body in all the right areas, and a pair of sneakers to complete her outfit. Simple but nice. She gave him a small smile.

"Thank you." She replied He looked just as amazing. Purple was definitely a great color for him. Her eyes couldn't help but notice the veins and muscles in his forearms. Her stomach jumped as her mind began to wander about the muscles that she couldn't see. She could feel her cheeks flush as visions of him holding her tight against him, kissing her, sparking every nerve in her body. She cleared her throat and said her monotone voice,

"Keys?"

-

Beast Boy had already put in the address of the location into the build in GPS. Raven just had to drive the route. She looked at the address not recognizing the street. She had figured she have to be told where they were going since she was driving and yet some how he still had figured out a way to keep it a secret. She drove quietly and smoothly letting Beast Boy talk about his online game he played. She listened to him talk about how the main guy he played with was coming to America and Beast Boy wanted him to come visit Jump City.

"I was thinking how cool would it be if we showed him the pizza place and the comic store?" He told her his voice full of excitement.

"I'm sure as long as there isn't any villains causing havoc, Robin would be cool with the team making a day trip to town." She stated looking down at the GPS she made a right hand turn taking further into the city. She felt a little bit uneasy realizing she had never been this side of town. Where was Beast Boy taking her?

"Oh, right-" He paused smiling at her. "I figured you know, it could just be you and I." He mumbled. Raven was seriously all he thought about. He didn't want to do anything without her by his side. Hiding her smile from him she sighed turning again down a street she didn't know.

"Okay seriously where are you taking me?" she questioned. He laughed and touched her arm.

"Don't you worry mama." he replied. She rolled her eyes knowing it was pointless to press it. She made a left hand turn and the GPS said,

"Your destination is on the left." slowing down she turned on her signal and turned into a small parking lot. Beast Boy just beamed at her.

"We're here." He rejoiced. He unbuckled his seat belt and hopped out of the car.

"And here is?" She asked looking outside her window. She gazed at the white building with the name of _Camellia's._ She unbuckled her seat belt and sighed. Her nerves were trying to get the best of her. Then her door opened for her.

"My lady." Beast Boy stated his arm stretched out ushering her out. She gave him a unsure look. "I promise you'll love this place." He assured her. She stepped out of the car. She looked around and noticed there wasn't a lot of people around. That help ease her a bit. She began to walk to the door. Beast Boy caught up to her smiling at her nervousness. He was glad he wasn't the only one. He looked down at her hand and instantly wanted it in his. Reaching out he grab it as swung. Catching her off guard she pulled away from him. Turning back to look at him she saw his disappointment. He gave her a small smile and apologized,

"Too soon. I know." He really didn't want to make her uncomfortable. She pushed her emotions down she had to keep them at bay out in public, but she knew she could hold his hand with out causing too much damage. She looked down at his hand and offers her to him. Smiling he accepted it. They walked hand and hand up to the door. He winked at her and opened the door. "Rae welcome to Camellia's."

Instantly she could smell different combinations of herbs and plants. It made her stomach drop as she began to realize what this place was. Stepping inside her eyes adjusted to the light. Looking around she saw shelves and shelves of teas. There were tables with little kettles and clear boxes filled with different herbs in them. Taking it all in she realized even though the shop wasn't very big there had to be at least 100 different types of teas here.

"Gar-" she stared amazed by it "This is-"

"Pretty cool huh?" He finished for her, his eyes shined in excitement. "You don't even know the best part." he said grabbing her hand leading her over to the left side of the store. He pointed to the jars full of herbs and plants. "You pick you flavor, any combination you want, then you brew it and take it to go. If you like it you can even make your own special box to take home." He explained. She gave him a huge smile. He had surprised her with an amazing new tea shop. Out of all the places he could have taken her he had made her feel special.

"You're kind of amazing." she pointed out. He blushed and grinned at her.

"Nah, I just really want to impress you." He replied he gently squeezed her hand. He went back to what he was saying before. "So, there is six different types to choose from, which I'm sure you would know." He pointed to the table they were standing in front of. "This is the white teas. The one next to it is Green, then it's Ohlong-"

"It's OOlong." she corrected him smirking at him

"Right OOlong, Black, Herbal, and Rooibos." He finished pointing to the last table. He nudged her slightly "Did you know white tea was the preferred drink of royalty as far back as the Tang Dynasty in China. Prized for its mild and delicate taste, white tea was known as the Emperor's Drink and the general population could not partake of it." he rattled off sounding like a tour guide. She stared at him shocked that he actually knew something of history?

"How did YOU know that?" She asked he smiled at her sheepishly.

"I'm actually super smart?" He said almost in a questioning tone. She narrowed her eyes at him.

"Right..." she replied she picked up one of the small jars labeled Jasmine she put it to her nose and breathed in its scent. "So tell me oh so smart one, how many other tea facts do you have in you pocket?" She asked picking up another jar. Catching his bluff he smiled.

"Okay so maybe the internet became my best friend last night what can I say?" he shrugged at her. She rolled her eyes and shook her head continuing to the next table. Green tea was never her favorite not sure she was even interested in this table she picked up a jar labeled Peachberry. She put it to her nose her face twisted in disgust and she sat the jar back down. She suddenly turned to walk away from the table and walked right into a little old lady.

"Oh I'm sorry." She apologized flustered that she had not even noticed her standing behind her.

"I'm the one who is sorry. I didn't mean to startled you." the old woman replied she noticed Raven was turning away for the Green tea somewhat in a hurry. "You don't like green tea much huh?" She asked Raven just nodded she looked over to Beast Boy who was smelling a selection of black teas. "Yes, not many of our younger customers do. Let me see looking at you I would say you are a tisane type of person, maybe drinking a white tea every so often?" She read her like a book. Raven smiled at her and nodded again. "I thought so. hmmm I'm going to find something you like hold on just a second dear." She then walked back behind the counter and then out of sight.

Beast Boy walked up to her touching the her elbow, "Smell this." he requested. She put her nose to the jar he was holding in his hand. She scrunched her nose and shook her head.

"Black licorice and mint?" she questioned She frowned at him. He gave her small smile.

"I kind of like it." he responded.

"Mint teas are for when your sick." she answered "Well I only drink mint tea when I'm sick."

"Hmm... that's good to know." He said returning the jar. "Are you finding anything you like?" He asked

"Not yet, but I haven't even been over to my favorite type yet." She answered looking back towards the counter where had that woman go? She walked to the herbal table and picked up a jar labeled Strawberry. Smelling it she instantly love it. She smiled satisfied that she had stuck with her traditional taste. She picked up another one and smelled it. Her body relaxed with just the smell of the teas. Beast Boy heart raced as he watched her smell the teas. He walked up behind her his finger pulled her hair out of the way he gently kiss her cheek. She blushed and stared at him. He shouldn't catch her off guard like that. She pushed the jar that she had in her hand at him.

He smell the soft scent and licked his lips. "That smells awesome." He said taking the jar out of her hand. "Pineapple."

"Try this dear." the woman had return and was holding a small tea cup out for Raven. Raven picked up the cup and looked at the tinted liquid she slowly raised it to her lips breathing in the scent. She sipped the tea letting the flavor sit in her mouth. She closed her eyes mulling over. Finally she smiled and responded,

"Vanilla, Lavender and-" she paused sipping it again. "Peach?" The old woman smiled and nodded

"Someone knows their herbs." She replied. "Would you like a cup of that then?" She asked Raven looked at Beast Boy. She handed him the cup and he tasted it.

"It's good, a little bitter." He commented "You get whatever you want." he beamed. She nodded to the old woman.

"I'll have a cup of that but I also want to make my own." She remarked

"Of course. I'll get that cup for you now." the old woman walked back into the back.

Beast Boy had gone back to smelling the herb teas. Had picked two that he liked and had them out if front of him. "I love this smell." He commented to Raven. He handed the jar to her and she instantly knew the smell.

"Lavender?" she questioned

He eyes met hers. He glaze was soft and tender. "That's you. Your smell." She blushed at him but held his gaze. Those green eyes gave her such peace. She suddenly felt a strange ping in her heart as she realized she really didn't want to ever leave this moment. An elated feeling washed over her. She stood on her tip toes and gently kiss him. She smiled and turned back to her teas. He shook his head the things she did to him. _'What a perfect day.'_ he thought.

-

Beast Boy paid for the teas and the small box that he insisted Raven get of her combination. He slip his tea and glanced at Raven who was slipping her second tea. She noticed his look and raised her eye brows. "What?" she asked

Shrugging he smirked "It's nothing I'm just admiring you." She gave him a look wondering how he could possibly think she was that beautiful.

"You want to taste mine?" She asked holding out her to go cup. He took it and slip it. He raised his eye brows surprised at its flavor.

"Thats good."

"Pomegranate and Cranberry." She replied.

"You don't like your tea too sweet do you?" he inquired she nodded. "You may not like mine then." he remarked handing it to her.

She sipped his and instantly her taste buds pick up pineapple. Just like this morning it was a very sweet blend. "I like it. It is sweet but not to bad." she stated. "Pineapple and Orange blossom." He nodded surprised she got the orange blossom she really did know her tea.

"You've got an amazing girl there." the woman said handing his card back to him. Raven felt her body tense embarrassed at the comment.

"Yeah she is pretty amazing." He confessed smiling at her.

"You two make a beautiful couple, you compliment each other well." She continued. It was Beast Boy turn to blush now.

"Thank you." He said sincerely.

Ding

The door chimed causing Raven to look up. Her breath caught in her mouth. Her cup dropped on to the floor causing Beast Boy to turn look at her then at the door.

"No." Raven muttered.

There in the door stood Lucas, his eyes wild and crazed. His hand shook as he held up a gun pointing straight at them. He aimed right at Raven and pulled the trigger. The bullet hit her shoulder knocking her back she went down hitting her head on the way.

Beast Boy yelled, "No!" Looking at Raven "You ASSHOLE!" he screamed He turned into a tiger ready to launch at him. Lucas raised the gun and pulled the trigger at him. Beast Boy growled in pain and when down.

Raven eyes fluttered opened looking to her left tears ran down her cheeks. She saw Beast Boy laying next to her blood covered his shirt and the floor next to her. She painfully reached out to him trying to grab his arm. Her body was trying to heal itself which cause deep unconsciousness, she fought against her body trying to see if he was okay. She need to heal him. Her hand gently touched his blood soaked arm.

"Stay with me." She whispered. She couldn't hear him or see him moving. Pain shot through her chest she looked up to see Lucas stepping on her wounded shoulder. Pure hate-redness course through her as she glared at him. She her eyes closed fighting all she could to keep from slipping under. Opening her eyes she saw Lucas gritting his teeth at her.

"If I can't have you. No one will." he spat. Then he raised the gun and pointed it straight at her head. She slipped into blackness as a shot rang in her ears.


	6. Chapter 6

It had been three months since Raven's first and last date with Garfield Logan. She let the hot water burn her skin as she sat in the shower. Her hand shook as she slowly dragged a razor blade across her skin. Her eyes dilated as she watched the blood rise and began to drip down her arm. Her lungs filled with air as she slowly let it out her mouth. Closing her eyes she let the pain consume her body. Feeling her blood drip down her arm she cried silence tears. There was nothing left of her broken heart.

After her 2 hour shower of cutting and healing herself so she could re-cut her skin. She felt numb as walked down the hall just in a towel. It had been three months of pure hell for her. Entering her room she climb into her bed seeking the only relieve she ever got. Not having any energy to even put on clothes she laid there waiting for sleep to take her. She awoke sometime later to knock.

"Go away Starfire." She was able to mutter before she rolled over. Starfire was the only one who still came to check on her anymore. Everyone dealt with Garfield death differently. Robin and Starfire pretty much had each other so although there were tears, time seem to mend their hearts. Robin had tried to comfort Raven at the funeral by saying at least he was with his parents now. That of course didn't help her at all she just felt more selfish for wanting him there with her. Starfire the sweet caring Star, ate a lot of pudding of sadness and cried but she even was somehow able to get over his death. Cyborg cried once then she didn't see him cry again after. He took BB death just has hard as she did. He asked Robin to let him transfer to Titans East. Robin of course didn't have much choice and told him that he'd have to come back every now and then to do system check for the tower. He hadn't been back since. At least she hadn't sense him in the tower since that day. The day after the shooting Cyborg pulled Raven into a hug and didn't let her go. He just held her there as tears streamed down her face. He didn't say anything, he didn't know what to say anyways.

Her door opened and Starfire stood at the foot of her bed. She moaned at her. "I told you to go away." she hissed

Star gave her sad look, "Friend Raven you are malnourished please come eat with Robin and I." she said. Raven shook her head

"I'm not hungry." she retorted.

"Robin said that if you don't eat, we will have to check you into a hospital." she whispered. She didn't want to make her upset she knew that she was in pain.

"Star," she started "Please tell Robin to fuck off." All she wanted was to be left alone. Why couldn't she just be left alone. Star bit her lip tears forming in her eyes.

"Beast Boy would have never wanted this for you." She replied. Raven's broken heart pounded at the mention of his name. Anger boiled out her body. The lights burst and her window cracked from her powers. She didn't have any control over them at all anymore.

"GET THE FUCK OUT!" she growled at her. Sighing Star left her alone in the dark to wrestle her demons. She turned over looking at her bed her eyes not use to the dark. Her mind began to play cruel tricks on her as she felt him there with her. Sighing she began whispering. "Go away, go away, go away." After awhile she felt the bed give as if something sat down.

"Gar?" she called out to the air. _'Raven.'_ his voice answered in her head. The pain in her chest magnified as she tried to breath. "I miss you so much." she whispered staring at the dark. She didn't hear anything this time. She closed her eyes trying to picture his face. His smile. "I'm so sorry." She let the darkness over take her again slipping deeper and deeper into the hole that she called home.

The door burst opened, causing Raven to jump she turned to tell who ever it was to go away. She saw two men in scrubs coming towards her bed.

"No get out!" she screamed her powers sending objects across the room. She then felt a sharp pain in her leg as she turned and saw Robin pushing a needle into her skin. Blackness began to fog her eyes.

"This is for your own good." He said

"We love you Raven." Star said somewhere she couldn't see. She felt the two men grabbing her arms and legs as she started to fight. She kicked and screamed.

"No don't let them take me. GARFIELD!"

-

Raven awoke with a start her tears had streamed down her face. Breathing deeply her heart pounded. She looked around not recognizing where she was. She could only make out piles of clothes and empty pizza boxes.

"It's okay." Came the tired voice laying next to her. She looked at him her hands shook as she reached out to touch him. "Same one?" Beast Boy asked.

"It's always the same." She answered she laid down on to his bare chest listening to his heart pound. Sighing she breathing in his sent.

-

The first thing Raven remembered hearing was the sound of sirens. She tried to open her eyes but she couldn't. Pain radiated through her body. The smelled of blood made her stomach churn. She hear a ding and the sound of feet shuffling. She felt someone grab her wrist feeling for a pulse. Something cold touched her chest she an unfamiliar voice came through her ears.

"Young female early twenties gun shot wound to the left shoulder." That's right she had been shot. Her mind flew into overdrive where was Beast Boy? "Isn't that one of the Titans?" came a different voice. She moaned trying to find her voice.

"Gar.." She finally got out slowly opening her mouth.

"Miss can you hear me?" the man asked her she felt her body being picked up she moaned again. "Can you tell me you're name?" She slowly opened her eyes.

"Raven." she whispered. The blackness crept back in taking her back into it.

-

"Are you going to be okay?" he mumbled as put his arm around her. Three months since the incident and Raven was still having the reoccurring nightmare. A dark lonely world where Lucas killed her best friend and the love of her life. The dream was so real to her body at times, that while she slept it would transport her right next to where ever he was. It knew what was best for her. It freaked her out the first time it had happened, but after about the fifth time she actually preferred it she hated when she woke up and he wasn't there next to her there to comfort her.

She pushed her face into his chest her body pressed on top of his. "I can't get close enough." She whispered as her lips touch his skin. It made his heart race as she said this. _'Any closer and I'd be inside you.'_ He thought his animal senses were always stronger at night and there she was on top of him saying things like that. His mind couldn't help but think about how he wanted her.

To say that the incident hadn't affected them would be a lie. Beast Boy was handling better than Raven. Although Raven felt more guilt about it then he did. She had dated Lucas and she had broken up with him as well. After she healed and recovered, she began to withdrew herself from the group. Just like she first joined the Titans she mostly stayed in her room only coming out to drink her tea and do missions. She had even pulled away from Beast Boy. They hadn't been on another date since that fateful day. Not that Beast Boy hadn't tried to get her to come out of her room. She claimed that she was fine just need to meditate but Beast Boy knew better. He just wish he knew how to help her. The only way he saw her is when he invited himself into her room. He just sit there and watch her mediate. It broke his heart to see her like this he just hoped that she come out of it. He had told her that it wasn't her fault and that he had been betrayed by someone too but every time she just nod.

-

When Raven woke up she was in the medical bay. Beast Boy sat by her side with his purple shirt stained with blood. His hand intertwined in hers. His eyes blood shot from lack of sleep.

"Hey Rae." He whispered he leaned down and kissed her forehead. "How are you feeling?" Tears filled her eyes as she stared at him.

"You're okay." She whispered her voice was soft. She eyed his bloody shirt.

"I'm okay now. I haven't stop praying since we left the hospital." His voice was low and full of fear. "I just kept thinking if she..." he didn't finish his sentence as tears filled his eyes. Shaking his head he looked down. He didn't have to finish it, the emotion that was coming off of him made her sick to stomach.

"I'm sorry." She replied guilt washed over her this was all her fault.

"You have nothing to be sorry about." He replied gently squeezing her hand. Tears ran down his face as he stared at the beautiful girl in front of him.

"You could have been seriously hurt or even killed. All because of someone I should have never trusted." She whimpered.

"If I remember correctly this isn't the first time someone has come into our lives and betrayed our trust." He pointed out to her. She just frowned in response. She should have known better. She should have been smarter, she was always so careful so why was this time different? Because of her recklessness someone she care about was almost killed. "You can't blame yourself Rae. I'm okay and most importantly you are okay."

Maybe it was all the emotion she was feeling but she couldn't help but not believe his words. She remembered why she didn't allow herself get close to people. It was because of this right here.

She lay on his chest and concentrated on his steady heart beat. "Azarath Metrion Zinthos" she breathed barley a whisper. It calmed her down having him there so she could get a handle on her emotions. She suddenly felt guilty for using him like this. She knew he didn't mind but it wasn't fair to him when she had shut him out like she had. She told herself that she wasn't going to hurt anyone anymore. Shutting people out was how she did it. Even if it broke her heart it was the only way. After a few minutes she felt like she was finally ready to go back to sleep she rolled away off of him and sat up. She wanted to leave quietly so he wouldn't wake up. Standing up focusing her power she felt something grab her arm.

"Please stay with me." He asked His grip was firm but it didn't hurt. She immediately thought of when she had reached out to him after he had been shot and had whispered the same thing to him.

"Beast Boy... the others? What would they think?" She began

"Screw the others what does it matter anyways? I never get to see you anymore." he spoke with anger in his voice. He wasn't trying to be mean he just wanted her next to him. He needed her.

"I'm sorry that I've been distant, but its for your own good." She apologized. She shivered as the cold air hit her bare legs. She climb back into his bed pulling the covers up she sat up looking at him.

"That's bull shit Raven and you know it." He retorted. She sighed suddenly cursing her powers for putting her in his room. He was tired and irritable.

"Go to sleep Beast Boy. We can talk in the morning." She huffed kicking off the covers again.

"I'm sorry." He replied his voice soft now. "I know these months have been hard on you but it's killing me watching you separate yourself from others. From me." he grab her waist with both arms. "I let you go once Raven and I promised I would never do it again."

-

After much pleading and begging from Raven and the others Beast Boy had to be physically removed from the medical bay. He was told he could come back after he showered, ate, and slept. He got out of the shower and turned into a dog. Shaking all the remaining water off of him he shifted back and swiftly walked to the kitchen. Cyborg had bought him a vegan pizza and it wasn't until he removed it from the box that he realized that he was indeed starving. His stomach growled in protest as he waited for the microwave to heat up his food. He ate quickly and moved swiftly back to the medical bay. Walking through his heart thumped as he saw an empty bed where Raven once was.

"Friend Beast Boy you're back already?" Star asked coming around the corner she had fresh sheets in her hand.

"Where is Raven?" He asked suddenly feeling panicky.

"She asked to rest in her room, Cyborg said she was well enough to leave." She turned around to see Beast Boy already gone from the room. She stood there wondering how he had left so fast.

He jogged down the hall and stop short at her door. He gave a swift knock before letting himself in without permission. Raven sat on her bed trying to mediate. Seeing him her mouth frowned.

"You were told to sleep before you were allowed to come back." She remarked. She closed her eyes focusing her magic.

"I couldn't sleep if I wanted to. I showered and ate I don't want to be force to do anything else." He told her. He sat down next to her, using all his will power not to just tackle and kiss her. She didn't respond she just continued to float above her bed. He hung his head feeling like he had gone back before the time on the roof. A time where he didn't know how or even what to say to her.

"Are you feeling better?" He asked.

"Yes thank you." She answered her tone sounding far away. Rubbing the back of his neck he wondered why it was so hard for him to talk to her all of the sudden.

"Are you gonna-" stopping half way he gulped forcing his uneasiness down. "You haven't even asked about what happen. Don't you want to know?"

"What is there to know? You're alive I'm alive and I'm sure the old lady is alive. Someone would have told me if she had died." Her tone was monotone but the word died hung in the air like a bad smell.

"Luc-" He started

"Don't say his name." She interrupted him.

"Uh the gunman? You wanna to know what happen to him?" He asked. Her body stiffed at question, she had just assumed he had been caught thrown into prison. What if he escaped? Leaving Beast Boy and her bleed to death. What if he's coming back? What if he came while everyone was sleep? She sat in silence her thoughts only freaking her out.

"He's dead." Beast Boy replied

-

Raven felt torn laying there next to Beast Boy in the dark, who was begging her to say with him. She knew what was logical but her heart told her to forget everything and let him love her.

"I've been thinking." Beast Boy said suddenly

"That's a first." She joked her voice full of sarcasm

"Ha ha very funny." he softly grinned at her. "Seriously just hear me out okay?"

"Oh Azar." She remarked knowing fully what ever he was about to say wasn't going to be something she liked.

"I was thinking..." He paused hesitating "We should start sleeping together." She gasped and raised her hand to slap him "Wait!" he yelled "Not like that, I mean I'd be up for that too..." he mumbled She shook her head and pushed him away from her.

"Pervert." She scoffed kicking her feet off the bed.

"Please Raven I was joking!" he begged he touched her arm _'kinda'_ he added to himself. "As I was saying, I think it would be better for both of us if we shared rooms. Like I moved my bed into yours or even an air mattress." he started explaining it to her. "That way if you have a nightmare I can comfort you and then you won't have to leave me in middle of the night."

Staring at him she felt her heart tear as she realized that he needed her just as much as she needed him. She had some how forgotten that Beast Boy was just as broken as she was. She sighed. "Robin will never go for it. He's so weird about that stuff." Robin had problem with setting up rules then feeling like he was the only one who was aloud to break said rules. It had always kinda bothered her but she wasn't about to call him out on it.

"Well you see, I kinda already talked to Robin about it and he thinks it a good idea." He confessed to her. Wide eyed she turned around to look at him.

"You did what?" She shot back

"Now don't get mad at me. I just told him that I think you need someone to help calm you down after you're dreams. I told him that I wanted to move my bed in there and he said that if it will help you heal then it's a good idea." Explaining to her. She remained silent unsure what to say. She wasn't doing a very good job keeping him away. "Everyone is worried about you we just want you back." He added.

"I appreciate the offer Beast Boy-" Beast Boy let out a big sigh.

"Why did you give up on us?" He cut her off his voice was serious and full of sadness.

"I don't know what you mean." She answered pretending that she couldn't understand his question.

"I don't know if you ever loved me but whatever you did feel for me is it gone?" He asked. "I need to know." She was hit will his sadness and pain. Emotion swelled up in her and they could hear things flying across the room. She ignored them as she let the emotions wash over her. What was wrong with her? Realizing that she had once again let Lucas stop her from being happy only this time he didn't even have to be alive. A single tear fell from her eye. She wiped it away and wrapped her arms around Beast Boy.

"I'm sorry." She replied "I do care about you, A LOT, I just... I'm broken." She confessed. He hugged her back his body ached for her. Both their hearts began to pound in the their chests. Besides their breathing it was the only sound in the room.

-

"He's dead?" She questioned she had stopped floating and was now sitting on the bed.

"Yes." He confirmed. "He shot you, you went down and I freaked out. I went after him but he shot me in the chest. He was a really crummy shot luckily. I woke up to you healing me." He explained. So she had healed him those few moments before her powers took over. Her eyes glimmered as she listened to the story. "I looked up seeing Lucas just above you gun pointed right at your head and then there was gun shot. My body immediately reacted thinking he had shot you but when I saw him fall I turned and saw the women. She killed him. She shot him." Her hands were over her mouth shocked that the little sweet old lady was the one who had been Lucas executioner. She didn't say anything letting her face speak for her.

"You don't have to worry about him coming back." Beast Boy whispered. He gently pulled her, enveloping her into his body. "We will be okay." He reassured her. He held her there listening to her heartbeat. That perfect heart keeping her with him. He suddenly felt like he needed to tell her everything in his heart so he never have to regret not saying it.

"I love you Rae." He whispered into her ear. Her body instantly became rigid under his arms. He pulled away looking away at her. He didn't expect her to say it back right then but he had hoped for something, anything, better then what he got.

"You should go get some sleep." She replied then she removed herself from his embrace.

-

Beast Boy hadn't said L word since that day. He wanted to so many times but he reserved from saying it because he couldn't stand the thought of not having it returned. It wasn't until that night as he laid in his bed holding a broken girl in his arms that he realized it didn't matter if she never returned it. He loved her and she should know it.

"I love you Raven." He said breaking the quiet. She looked at him this time she didn't tense up or leave his embrace. The two words that left her mouth would change their lives forever.

"Show me."

It was hush whisper but the tone was anything but quiet. His eyes began to search hers wondering if she was implying what he thought she was. To confirm what she was saying, he sat up and kissed her for the first time since their first date. She returned his kiss eagerly. She had miss his lips and taste. Passion ripped through his body as he realized that he couldn't hold back if she continued to kiss like this. Her hands moved up and down his arms letting her mind focus on him. His hands couldn't help as he lifted the shirt she was wearing. Expecting her to freeze and tell him to knock it off, he was shocked as she pulled away smiled softly at him and removed her over size t shirt. He couldn't help but smile at her as she laid down waiting for him work his magic on her. He kissed her and his hands moved up her stomach sending shivers up her body. As his hands moved and came to rest on her chest is that he realized she wasn't wearing anything but underwear. He pulled his lips away and began to kiss her neck and his hands got to know her body better. She was so thin and muscular his mind raced to all things he wanted to do to her. All things he want to do to please that perfect body.

"Gar." she moaned as his lips moved down her chest. He pulled away and kiss her lips.

"I love your amazing lips." He commented he kiss them again then he moved down her neck "I love this neck." He kissed right where her pulse was. He could feel her pulse racing under his lips. Smiling he moved down, kissing her chest. She moaned in response. He took his hand and he placed it on her thigh pushing it slightly so he could get in between her legs. Moving them willingly she kissed him and her hands now touching his abs moving closer to his hips.

"God I love you're body." He moaned as kissed her tight stomach.

"Show me." She said this time it was more of commanding tone. He smiled at her and kissed her. He slipped his hands down and began to pull off her underwear removing them completely and tossing them behind him. His fingers instantly finding her. It was clear her body wanted him as much has his wanted hers. Her breathing became erratic as he continued to slide his fingers into her. She couldn't help but think of her dream she had months ago back before she started having nightmares. Just like in the dream his fingers were like magic drugs to her that made her body quiver and shake for more. This was real, not a dream, she was really in his room letting him explore parts of her that never been touched before. Bam came a huge crash as something big hit the wall. Her powers had thrown something across the room. Beast Boy pulled away from her lips to turn to look only to have his face pulled back down.

"It's fine." She said not wanting him to stop. He gave her a solid kiss before breaking away. He removed his boxers, climbing back to her he grab her hands and held them in his. His eyes searching hers. This was it he was giving her one last chance to change her mind praying that she wouldn't. He kissed the back of her hand waiting to her say stop. She gazed into his perfect emeralds. Her body ached for him. Taking a deep breath she opened her mouth.

"Please love me until I'm me again." she whispered. She wanted this, she need him to help fix her. Some how he knew her body better then she did and after her permission he began to work on fixing the broken parts of her. He began to made her fill whole again.

-

After, Beast Boy held her close to his body almost afraid if he let go something would come and try to take her away from him again. She was his now. No one was allowed to have her. He breathed in her perfect scent that made him so high. Tiredness consumed their bodies, lack of sleep plus, fixing each other was proving to be exhausting. He gently kiss her forehead letting his lips linger there.

"I love you Rae." He said his voice sounding groggy but satisfied.

"I know." She replied her eyes were already closed and she was close to that perfect state of almost sleep. After a few minutes they were both nearing deep sleep she whispered, "Thank you love." Beast Boy either didn't hear it or he was to tired to answer. With his warmness enveloping her, it wasn't long before she had slipped into welcoming arms of sleep.

-

He woke with his arms tangled around the girl who seemed to make everything better. He pulled her closer to his body letting her scent wash over him. Taking a deep breath in he smiled. He wanted this he wanted to wake up every morning to her. She slept soundly her face was calm. He couldn't help but kiss her cheek. This action cause her to start stirring. She arched her back stretching a small smile formed on her face. Her perfect violet eyes fluttered open sending his heart into Tachycardia.

"Hey." He greeted her. She looked at him and muttered,

"Hello."

"I'm going to go get in the shower. Then I want to make you breakfast." He commented kissing her softly.

"None of that tofu crap okay?" she answered. She rolled over burying half her face into the pillow sighing, she smiled slightly. That was it, right there, Beast Boy didn't care about anything else. The overwhelming feeling washed over him as he realized that this was what life was really all about. He had found his life.

He pulled himself away from the bed and all thoughts of staying there all day to watch her. He looked around his now destroyed room. which was never that different anyways. Smiling to himself he thought about how perfect last night was. He looked around trying to locate his boxers. He turned around his eyes searching. He scratch his head. "Where did those go?" he asked He searched over by the bed he tossed a few items aside and picked up black lacey underwear. "Who's are-?" he stopped mid sentence his eyes looked towards Raven who had fallen back asleep. _'Duh dummy!'_ He smiled and and picked up the large t shirt she had on from last night. He instantly recognized it. _'It's this mine?'_ he thought. How did she steal it without him realizing it. With the items in hand he placed them by her so she see them. Looking down he found his favorite shorts and decided they would work and put them on. Going to his dresser which had been knocked over, he pushed it up right and shuffled through the clothes. He pulled out clean clothes and left the room.

Raven woke up feeling rested and contented. She hadn't had the dream again which made her more happy. She loathed nights when her mind decided to play dream two or three times at night. She rolled over and looked at Beast Boy's room. Noting that while it was messy before it now looked like a tornado ripped through it. Sighing she wondered how no one came to check on the noise, although she was grateful no one had. She would have been mortified if Robin came in while _things_ were taking place. ' _Things?'_ she questioned to herself it wasn't just things. It was Beast Boy showing her how much he loved her and she accepted it wholeheartedly. She wanted it. A small smile grew on her face as a feeling of pleasure washed over her. Her heart skipped a beat thinking of how he had touched her last night. So soft and gentle. She noticed her clothes placed nicely out for her she put them on quickly. Looking around the room she decided it was only fair to clean up. Using her powers she made piles of dirty clothes, trash, books, and other items. After each pile had found its intended home she made his bed.

She thought about how a few years back, she had been the one that convinced him to grow up and get rid of his bunk beds. She told him that he wasn't in a military camp and he was too old to be having guys or girls over for sleep overs. After his comment of trying to get girls into bed with him, one of those girls being her, she promptly pushed him out the window. It was almost funny to her because that's exactly what he had done. She turned and noticed a picture of her on his desk. Picking up the picture she didn't recognize it wondering when it was taken. The picture was taken outside, from the side few. Her hair was partly in her face but she could see a little smirk on her lips. It wasn't anything special especially not a glamour shot by any means, but the fact that it was on his desk, showed that he cared about it.

Her stomach growled letting her know it was time for something to eat. Considering how late it was she decided that she should get pants since the others would be up. She ran her hand through her hair and wish she hadn't slept in. She needed a shower but it would have to wait her herb tea was calling her name.

-

Beast Boy walked into the common room to see Starfire in the kitchen. Smiling he skipped down the steps into the kitchen.

"Hey Star." He greeted her. She turned with a cup of coffee in her hand and smiled at him.

"Good morning friend! You look happy this morning." She noticed his grin. He pulled out a frying pan and put it on the burner.

"I am very happy." He answered he opened the fridge pulling out eggs, peppers, ham,and cheese. Carrying them all in his arms he sat them on the counter. Star noticed this and smiled.

"Are you happy for a certain reason or just because it's a beautiful day?" She asked Beast Boy opened the cupboard pulling out a bowl then a fork from the drawer.

"I'm happy because life is amazing." He replied. Just then Raven walked in. Beast Boy looked up and smiled his heart jumping into his throat. Star saw this and smirked.

"I do see why life is so amazing." she commented she picked up her bowl full of Zorkaberries.

"Hello mamacita." Beast Boy said in his fake Spanish accent. Raven rolled her eyes at him walking towards her tea cupboard. "Hey I'm making you breakfast remember?" he remarked as he cornered her and gently pushed her out of the kitchen.

"I'm fully capable of making my own tea." Raven stated eyeing him making eggs. "Are you making eggs?" She asked.

"It's an omelette and its for you." He told her whipping the eggs with the fork. She narrowed her eyes at him.

"That's very sweet of you Beast Boy, to make breakfast for your-" Star started but stopped looking at Raven. Beast Boy blushed and started chopping up the green bell pepper not saying anything. Raven looked at Star raising her eyebrows. They had never mentioned anything about their relationship. She couldn't blame Star for that. Biting her lip sightly and looking at Beast Boy she surprised herself by completing Stars sentence.

"Girlfriend." Beast Boy looked up at her shocked that it had come from her mouth. Star smiled and popped another berry into her mouth. Beast Boy couldn't help but smile at the situation. He continued to cook the omelette adding in the peppers. Raven watched him closely as he began to cut up pieces of ham. His face was concentrated on his task but she couldn't help but notice his nose turn up in disgust.

"You don't have to put ham in it." She remarked. She liked ham but it wasn't worth it if it made him sick.

"Nah!" He answered still cutting. "It's not a true omelette without ham." using the knife he slid the ham into the pan. Her heart skipped as he looked up at her smiling showing off his fang. She had to admit he was really cute cooking something for her. He added the cheese, then picking up the pan he flicked his wrist a few times. The omelette lifted and then flipped he caught it effortlessly. Raven stared amazed she never seen him do this.

"How did you?" She began her words caught into her mouth.

"Two words..." He explained. "Food Network." he chuckled and grabbed a plate. He flipped it onto the plate and placed it in front of her. She rolled her eyes as the smell hit her nose making her stomach growl.

"Bon Appétit!" He said handing her a fork. Taking the fork she thanked him and took a small bite.

"This is really good." She remarked her eyes wide at her food.

"Don't sound so surprised Rae." He winked at her and picked up the pan and putting it into the sink. He then went to the cupboard and grabbed his cereal. Amazed at him she watched as he began to pour himself a bowl. He just cooked her an amazing dish and he was having cereal?

It wasn't just that he had made her breakfast going out of his comfort zone cooking meat, it was how he walked around the kitchen bowl in hand humming something. How he made an effort to make her happy. How cute he was flashing his signature smile just for her. Just in that moment she couldn't help but think, _'I really love you.'_

"I love you." she whispered to herself taking another bite of her breakfast. Beast Boy turned and looked at her a small smile forming on his face. His amazing ears had caught her whispering. He dropped his bowl into the sink. Making her jump. He went around the counter and proceeded to pick Raven up and threw her over his shoulder effortlessly.

"Beast Boy!" She yelled "What are you doing?" she threw her arms around his back. He held on to her legs and turned to Star who was staring at them.

"Star excuse us. I have to go make out with my girlfriend." He announced.

"Put me down right now!" Raven growled. Star giggled as she watched Beast Boy carry Raven up the stairs.

"Garfield Logan!" she yelled using his full name. He smiled again.

"Raven, if you keep protesting I won't bring you back to your food." He answered. He stepped through the door and walked down the hall to her room. As she sat up her arm folded. In front of her room he put her down.

"You're in so much-" She started cut off by his lips. She pushed away and glared at him.

"I heard you." He said leading back into her. She rolled her eyes as his lips touched hers. Raising her arms and putting them around his neck. She kissed him her heart pounding in response. He pulled away and stared into those perfect eyes.

"I love you Raven." He spoke his voice sounding husky. She smiled at him.

"I love you too Gar." She answered as pressed her lips back on to his. 


End file.
